He's Just Not That Into You

He's Just Not That Into You tells the stories of a group of interconnected, Baltimore-based twenty- and thirtysomethings as they navigate their various relationships from the shallow end of the dating pool through the deep, murky waters of married life, trying to read the signs of the opposite sex... and hoping to be the exceptions to the "no-exceptions" rule.
Gigi just wants a man who says he'll call-and does-while Alex advises her to stop sitting by the phone. Beth wonders if she should call it off after years of committed singlehood with her boyfriend, Neil, but he doesn't think there's a single thing wrong with their unmarried life. Janine's not sure if she can trust her husband, Ben, who can't quite trust himself around Anna. Anna can't decide between the sexy married guy, or her straightforward, no-sparks standby, Conor, who can't get over the fact that he can't have her. And Mary, who's found an entire network of loving, supportive men, just needs to find one who's straight.
If you've ever sat by the phone wondering why he said he would call, but didn't, or if you can't figure out why she doesn't want to sleep with you anymore, or why your relationship just isn't going to the next level.. he (or she) is just not that into you.

That synopsis comes straight from the He's Just Not That Into You movie website, and it's appropriate that it does not use any "feel good" language in describing this film. Sure, I laughed at parts, but as the credits rolled and we shuffled out of the theater I could not shake an whelming feeling of hopelessness. This movie may be realistic in the sense that the girl doesn't always get the guy (or vice versa), but it only highlighted the ever-increasing complexity of relationships today.

This story is driven by Gigi's growing understanding of men, how they think, and how they show a girl that he is interested. She doesn't get it. She makes a fool of herself to keep the attention and affection of a man who may only wants her for a little bit but really isn't that into her. Gigi is only looking for the right guy- to find love- and luckily meets a guy friend who coaches her through men's "complex" signals. The humorous truth of women overanalyzing every detail of a date while men remain straight-forward drives this plot past the limit to the point of confusion and hypocrisy.

The depiction of marriage was really confusing to me. In a span of two hours the film depicted marriage as a dreaded death sentence, a wonderful completion to a longstanding relationship, and worth throwing out the window because of boredom. I didn't get it. One message Hollywood sends in this film is that if you fall in love with somebody (what does that even mean anyway?) it doesn't matter what it takes to secure them, even if that means ruining a marriage. In giving advice to Anna (Scarlett Johansen) who likes a very married guy, Mary (Drew Barrymore... who also produced this film) tells Anna something along the lines of (I try to quote), "How could you come across the love of you life and have to pass him up because you are already married?" Unbelievable.

Anyway, I don't want to ruin the plot for those who want to see it- it's a "cute movie" and entertaining. I was unimpressed with the messages this film sent because I know there is more hope than that- than wondering if you are the rule or the exception to the rule, than calling your marriage quits because of mistakes, or than having your whole love life hinge on if you can interpret a guy's not-so-straight-forward hints. Hollywood has made things OK that shouldn't be, and we shouldn't accept its interpretation on life.

If you've seen it, let me know what you honestly think. Maybe I harbor too much negativity towards it, but then again I'm just ranting!